My Dear Brave Boy,
It’s been a while since I wrote you a letter.
Yesterday was a big day for you. After months of talking about it and studying what it means, you decided to get water baptized. So many things happened in order for you to get baptized.
It wasn’t that long ago that you were afraid of water. I was so happy for you when you started learning to swim and overcame that fear. You have a lot of fun now with Sissy every time Dad takes you swimming. I could see the courage in your eyes when the pastor had you get ready to go under the water. There may have been a lingering fear or hesitation, but you pushed through and obeyed what the Lord was leading you to do.
That’s not the only milestone you have overcome lately. A few months ago you decided you were ready to learn all the steps of doing an insulin pump site change. It took time and effort, but you learned it all! And after nearly 4 years of tears, anxiety and even panic at times, you are able to do it yourself with almost no effort now. I don’t have the words to tell you how relieved I am, and proud of you. We rewarded you by activating your phone so you could go to your cousins’ house for your first overnighter without us. I could see the new maturity and grit in your eyes.
We have made it through some rough patches where you feel an overwhelming amount of negative emotions. I have had to remind you often that you and your sister are complete miracles, formed entirely out of God’s incredible grace and love toward us. I have enjoyed watching you embrace that truth and grow in your own relationship with Christ. Which is what led to your desire to take the next step and be baptized.
On a side note, it was hard for Sis to watch you get baptized without her. She wants to experience everything with you (even going so far as to say she wishes she had diabetes sometimes) because she loves you so much. Did you hear her say she wished she could wear her water wings in the baptismal so she could be “bap-a-tized” too?? We got a good laugh out of that one! Thank you for setting a good example for her to follow.
Once you were all dried off, new clothes on and heading back to service I asked you if the Lord had said anything to you, or if you felt different. Your answer brought tears because I know how much you have struggled with feelings of unworthiness, loneliness and self-hate. I had prayed that God would do a miracle when you were under the water. Something only He can do. I prayed for your heart. Those deep places only you and He know about. And He answered. When you came up out of the water, He gave you that miracle. You told me, “Mom. I feel completely forgiven. I feel so incredible.”
To feel completely forgiven. What a gift. Nothing separating you from the love of God. Now you have your whole life ahead of you, to live in uninhibited relationship with your Savior.
I can’t wait to see where He leads you. Because you are His. You are God’s boy.