George didn’t sleep well last night. He was up from 11:00 until probably 3ish and it was frustrating for me. I tried everything I knew how to do, and when Shane came home at 1:30 I was still trying. So he tried for a bit, then I felt guilty because he had just worked a full shift so I took over again. Then we were up at 5:30, gave him a bottle, back to sleep by 6…needless to say it wasn’t my favorite night of all time.
The issue isn’t just lack of sleep. It is that frustration that comes with not knowing exactly what to do, and also realizing that this little person is not getting rest either and you’re going to have a rough day the next day.
When I heard Shane get him this morning around 8, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and went back to sleep for quite some time. When I finally came downstairs, Shane was incredibly gentle and kind. Who knows what I looked like and I felt just horrible. He had coffee made, dishwasher emptied, George was fed and happily playing and most of all, Shane was loving and understanding. I’m sure he was exhausted too, but he didn’t say that he was…which actually spoke louder to me than if he had.
What he did say was, “We have a baby! I’m not worried about it. Its just the season we are in.” Those few words helped me get my perspective back. One bad night doesn’t mean my son will have ADHD and horrible sleep problems his whole life.
I took George with me to run some errands which ended up being rather ridiculous. He was great! But my bank couldn’t figure out why my debit card wouldn’t work and after 30 or 45 minutes of them not figuring it out, and George about to climb the walls, they finally fixed it. I then went to Safeway and was going to reward myself with all the fixings for delicious tostadas. But I couldn’t find the guacamole (the real reason I wanted tostadas was for the dripping, delicious zesty guacamole dip). I think I wandered that #$%^ store for at least 45 extra minutes only to realize there is no zesty guacamole dip.
It seems kind of laughable now, but at the time I was completely starving, exhausted, frustrated and probably out of my mind because I bought George a box of toddler cookies (I still can’t believe I did it) and helped him eat quite a bit of it as we searched frantically for zesty guacamole dip for 45 minutes.
When I finally got home, there was Shane again. Patient, loving, caring and having enough wits about him not to laugh at me or tease me at that moment.
I’ve been given a great partner to walk through this life with. All that I wrote above is just everyday, ordinary things for a stay at home mom with a 13 month old son. What is extraordinary is a man who knows how to be the best life partner and husband in the world…yet not have to say a word about it. His actions spoke louder than words today. I am so grateful.